Maybe one of the hardest questions to answer is: to leave or to stay? Be it a job, a friendship, a place or a relationship. The answer to the question will always be difficult and painful. Nothing is certain, what if you give it your all for one last time and it finally works? But also, what if it doesn’t and breaks you even more? What if you let go and leave? What if years from now you are drown into thoughts of what could have been?
- First things first, understand the problem. We often start thinking of leaving when our expectations are no longer being met
We always want to leave the second our expectations are not being met. Unfortunately, we always expect things to be calm and happy, and once they get tough we start questioning whether we should leave or stay? But things shouldn’t be that way. We have expectations of how we want things to work out, and things don’t always have to go the way we want them to. So, easy on yourself and on your partner. If you don’t make it to your desired destination with your partner, pick a different road, and it’s fine if it doesn’t turn out to be an easy one. You just gotta stick to the road trip and maybe enjoy whatever adventures it brings.
- Now here are the two things you need to put in mind;
1- Don’t listen to others:
I know you have had enough of your friends telling you what to do. And to be honest their support is surely needed. But still, no one is you. No one has walked the miles you have walked. No one has given the love you have given or felt what you’ve felt. I am not here to tell you that you should stop listening to your friends, but you’re the only storyteller to your story and you’re the only one capable of writing your own chapters. Your friends might tell you to leave, but they won’t feel the pain of losing the other person. Maybe they will support you to stay under the name of love, but they won’t sense the toxicity this relationship is bringing into your life. They will never be able to carry off any of your pain, yet, they can make it more bearable. Remember that at the end of the day, nobody can guarantee you the right certain answer.
2- Don’t self-sacrifice:
It’s kind if you don’t wanna leave so you don’t crush your partner, however, it’s not very smart. You can’t choose to crush your own self for the sake of someone who all you get from is harm! You’re not selfish for putting your needs first. Maybe you are with someone who won’t let you grow, or someone who won’t let you look close enough within yourself and discover it. You don’t have to stay in that situation. It’s totally fine if you choose yourself above whatever that is stopping you from growing. Do not sacrifice your own growth for someone or something that won’t appreciate you. Learn to choose yourself, and that it’s not selfishness.
Now, whether your choice is to stay or to leave, which by the way won’t be easy, make sure it’s like a one-way ticket. If your choice today is to end that toxic relationship that has been dimming your light for years, then do it! Never look back. Don’t just turn the page, burn it if necessary. If your choice is to continue fighting for the ones you think deserves fighting and caring for, then do it, and please do it unconditionally with zero regrets.