Not your typical love article

Every once in a while, I come across an article that talks about love. That’s not entirely bad, after all, what is life without love? What bothers me here is not the idea of constantly writing about love, it’s the idea of writing about just one side of love, until all other sides become practically non-existent. Love has become a flat concept, a naive one if I dare say. Love is always portrayed as the magical, effortless feeling that sweeps you off your feet when the person you have feelings for you step in the door. It’s all butterflies and fireworks and Frank Sinatra playing in the background, and it _has to last forever to be real love._ If you talk about how love isn’t just a feeling that comes and goes, unexplained, uninvited, or how love takes commitment and effort, everyone in the room would shift uncomfortably in their seats; you just ruined their fairy-tale. The oh-so-beautiful idea of falling in love has become shaken for them, so they turn a blind eye. But what if we talk about the other end of the spectrum? Falling out of love; the land where butterflies cease to exist, and fires are extinguished. The land where all is dark. You fall in love and all the quirks and habits of your loved one are more than endearing; it sets your heart on fire when they pronounce a word in a certain way, or how they keep making theories about each movie and TV show they ever watch. Then it feels like a bucket of ice has been dropped on your head when those endearing habits start to set your teeth on edge, instead of your heart on fire; you realize that you’ve fallen out of love. Your patience becomes finite, you feel like you’re in love with a memory, rather than a person of flesh and bones. Some people refuse to believe that a reason why a relationship ends is simply falling out of love; not a huge fight, and not someone cheating, just falling out of love. The simple answer as to why this happens is the same reason why one falls in love: We’re human. We’re built to fall in and out of love. We’re so deluded with the idea of a happily ever after that we don’t acknowledge that not all love has to last to infinity, and we also refuse to acknowledge that even if we fall out of love it doesn’t take away from the fact that our love was real and true. Love doesn’t have to stay forever to be considered “true love”. Each of us experiences love in a unique way, it doesn’t have to be labelled or put in a certain box because there’s not text-book, there’s no wiki-how to falling in love. We only have to dive into the experience headfirst, embrace it with all it’s irregularities, because one thing all cliché articles are right about is love being a truly beautiful thing.

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